Aaaa, can you believe it? It’s already been three whole months since I first got my phalloplasty!
While I couldn’t find any party hats tiny enough for Spot to celebrate the occasion properly, I’m instead offering a photo retrospective showing the then-and-now of the surgery.
* THE MAIN EVENT, aka SPOT *
^ THEN: Three fistulas opening at different times, all underneath the head, made urination tricky. Marker lines left on my dong from surgery team looked a little awkward for the first couple weeks. Stitches everywhere.
^ NOW: Fistulas have healed! Yay! Urine stream has healed… a little oddly, veering waaaay over to the left, but it does so in a predictable pattern, so it’s not any trouble to correct for. Stitches have faded to a birthmark shade of light purple. No skin bubbles left underneath the shaft between stitches. The tip’s gained some scruffiness from arm hair growing back in.
Overall, my dong even got a seal of approval from my general MD back home during my annual physical exam a couple weeks ago! She was all kinds of impressed.
* THE RUBBER CHICKEN ARM *
^ THEN: Looked like nothing alive. Had the sickly sweet smell of
wound dressing and disinfectant. Needed at least five minutes to
unbundle all the bandages and dressings to reveal itself to the world
and possibly terrify any children/onlookers. Healed with such thick
scarring at the wrist as to cause me to lose most of my hand/wrist
mobility for some time.
^ NOW: Much more healthy-looking in its color and overall appearance. Regular hand therapy has returned hand/wrist motion nearly back to normal, with some wrist stiffness and a slightly swollen/reddish hand. Still terrifies small children if left uncovered. This Halloween opens up a whole universe of possibilities.
* THE LEG *
^ THEN: Sticky gummy hell for the first week, then itchy flaky hell for the next two. Had to be kept constantly bandaged, so as not to soak anything laid over it. Made sleeping at night… problematic.
^ NOW: Has healed immensely! No drippage, stickiness, or shedding snow-like skin flakes anywhere for months. Barely even looks like Rocky Horror Picture Show lips anymore. More like a rectangular mild sunburn.
* THE SEROUS FLUID LEAK *
THEN: Scourge of daily living from five days after surgery through ‘till very recently. Needed bandaging at all times, lest it soak through whatever I was wearing and make it look like I’d pissed all over whichever car seat I was riding in.
NOW: Killed in Vietnam. Or healed itself out of existence. (I always get those two confused.) It will not be mourned.
* CONSTANT URGE TO WHIP SPOT OUT AND URINATE ON ANYTHING WITHIN RANGE *
THEN: My immediate giddy thought whenever walking past anything standing still: “I could pee on that now. Should I? SHOULD I? I TOTALLY CAN!! Wait no that’s probably a bad idea…”
NOW: I have somehow not racked up any public indecency charges. This baffles me. I had no idea my willpower could hold out for this long.
* OTHER THINGS I CAN DO NOW THAT THREE MONTHS HAVE PASSED *
– Carry objects over 25 pounds! Yay, I get to… start taking out the trash every week again. Hm. (Still, yay!)
– Accept penetrative sex with my original plumbing (or as I call it, the Warp Zone)! [NOTE: I had the okay to be on the penetrating end of penetrative sex a month earlier, with the downsides that (A) without an inflatable rod put in surgically, I’d be nothing but floppy, so (B) I’d probably have to double-bag Spot with a couple of condoms to attain a hope of being rigid enough to put it in. The More You Know!™]
Here’s to another three months, and then another, and another, and so on! [blows party horn]
Chinchilla Meat 